The World Through an Empath’s Eyes
The following was originally published in Enough-ism: This Minimalist Wants More and the Enough-ism Podcast.
“I believe that the world would be greatly enriched if people more often allowed themselves to step into their authenticity. The real you, the one you are comfortable being when you feel inspired, is the one that the world needs to see.”
So says empath and life coach, Julian Richard, Founder of The Way To Your Purpose (TheWayToYourPurpose.com). Julian, who started meditating when he was 16, sat down with the Enough-ism Podcast to discuss what it’s like being an empath and how meditation sparks compassion.
Learn more about what being an empath means and how to use this gift as a way to change your perception of the world in our conversation below.
Listen to the full podcast conversation here.
Using empathy as a tool to navigate the greater world
Let’s talk about being an empath. So what does that mean for you and your life?
Julian: It means being able to pick up on other people’s emotions. It’s almost as if they were your own. It’s very easy to read other people and to basically look behind whatever they’re projecting or whatever they’re portraying themselves as.
When did you first start to realize you had an ability to read people and kind of dig deeper into people’s emotions and what they’re feeling?
Julian: I always had it. But I never really put a name to it. It was later in my life where I started to read up on the topic and I began to realize there’s a community of people — that there’s a lot of people — like this. And that there is an actual name for it. It’s just always been my experience.
I use [being an empath] as a tool. Especially when you meet new people and are interacting and navigating the complexity of human emotions.
Of course, at times it has been a blessing and a curse. This is because you are so, so able to read what people are sending out, so to speak. But at the same time, you are very receptive to that. So it is a blessing in the sense that you’re able to generate a lot of compassion and empathy for other people. You’re able to get a sense of who they are. You get a sense of what they’re going through and what kind of struggles they’re dealing with. And this is great because it opens up this shared space of connection that becomes possible. But at the same time, you’re also extremely open — or at least I am extremely open and receptive — to the pain and the suffering that’s also out there.
And that you just can’t put up a shield. You just are exposed to it. And this is also what motivates me to then go forward and to help those people.
Is there an example of a particularly memorable interaction or experience where you were able to maybe pick up on something, maybe where someone else was not? Or where you were able to kind of read something and help them through?
Julian: Yeah. I guess I’ve always been someone who was able to be authentic with people so that they didn’t have to present themselves as something that they think they have to, but what they actually are and who they actually are.
I’ve always been someone who allowed other people to be authentic because authenticity is something that I value for myself as well.
I think I’ve always been someone who allowed other people to be authentic because authenticity is something that I value for myself as well. So it’s always been my experience. It’s not really one experience in particular. It’s, just the standard — this kind of authentic communication and connection.
Something that I just personally can’t do is be inauthentic. To be polite, and to just go with the norm — the convention of what you have to say. It’s hard for me to then stick to the script of the social norm.
Yeah. Small talk is exhausting anyway, for a lot of people. You know, you talk about authenticity and kind of digging below the surface. You know, many people present themselves in a way that is not true to who they are. I think it was JIM CARREY, if I remember correctly, who said something like depression, for example, is really about how you’re kind of living your life as an avatar, where you’re kind of going through the motions of who you would think you should be. And there’s a big gap in between who you really are and what would really make you happy and then how you’re living your day to day and what your kind of everyday grind looks like. And does that relate to you?
Julian: Yes, absolutely. That is what I want to achieve with my coaching. So, I am becoming a coach and my goal is actually to put people in touch with that authentic self. It’s to really step into that quality because I see that quality in everyone. I see everyone as like a unique spark and I see the beauty everyone has in their uniqueness.
And that is what I want to encourage people to step into and to realize — how valuable that actually is and that they don’t have to stick to what other people expect of them.
Yeah, totally. And that reminds me of there’s this meditation practice I used to do, like around new Year's, where you do a reflection on your life and your big goals. And you take something that you want to achieve that you could do to make you happy, whether that’s, “Oh, I want to move out of the country into the city,” or vice versa. That would make me happy, whatever it is. And then you make a list, even if it’s just two or three things. Reasons that you tell yourself why you can’t do that. Oh, I can’t do that because I have a lot of stuff and it’s too much of a pain for me to move right now, or, oh, I can’t do that because I have a job here and I would have to get a new job, and all these things where if you wanted to, you could change them and they don’t necessarily stand in your way.
I guess what I’m trying to say is there are blockages in our minds that prevent us from kind of living our best life and do you think that we kind of lose ourselves along the way? And we just kind of go along this path and it’s not our path. Maybe it’s someone else’s, maybe we think it’s ours, but really it’s just kind of societal norms holding us down.
Julian: I think it varies from person to person. What I’ve noticed, or what I believe, is that when we’re younger, we are spontaneously more in tune with that side of ourselves. And we would allow ourselves more to express that, like, spontaneously. But I think that, yeah, in many cases — or probably in most cases — we believe that we have to fulfill a certain norm in order to function in the world. And so we have to somehow discard that. That spark that we once had. But if we realize that we could find our way back to that, then our lives be much more fulfilled. And I think in some unique instances, it isn’t the case that someone loses it. Like people like you mentioned earlier— Jim Carrey — I think is, is an example of someone who is allowing himself to let that shine through. Because he’s allowing himself to not listen to outside pressures, but to just let that light shine through from within.
I’d say it takes some courage to step into that because you aren’t getting any reinforcement from outside in many cases. There’s no one telling you how to do this. Well, I’m here to tell you how to do it, but, everyone has to find that way in the end, and it’s a very vulnerable thing to do, you know?
Oh, totally. So when it comes to changing your inner dialogue and changing your relationship with yourself and also with the world around you, how does the average person go about doing that? Is it about kind of changing our environment and the external factors that shape who you are? Is it about changing your inner dialogue and using different words where you can kind of rewrite your life and kind of shift the direction you’re going in?
Julian: We already know what it is. But what we’re lacking is courage. Because we’re afraid of being judged or we’re afraid of not being accepted. So we have this knowledge inside of ourselves. And I think that while being authentic, in many cases we’re allowing ourselves to be authentic in certain situations or when we’re on our own — when we’re in our own thoughts.
What it takes is the encouragement to realize that this treasure, this thing that you have inside yourself — this is valuable and people actually want to see that from you. So I think it’s less a matter of finding what it is. It’s more a matter of drawing it out and living with it and having the courage to really step into it.
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About the author: Yugen Bond is a metaphysics writer, reiki master, and podcast host who once thought meditation was boring, had both too much and nothing to wear, and didn’t know how to slow down her thoughts. What a journey it’s been. Time to share it with the world, especially with you.
About Julian: Check out TheWayToYourPurpose.com
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